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Meet a Brit at The Breslin April 3, 2010

Stilton, Scrumpets and Crisps. Oh My!

The Breslin is attached to the oh so hip Ace hotel.  This is nice, because you can choose to have cocktails in the hotel lounge where there are couches and such.  But the past three times I went to this lounge, no dice finding a seat.   And this space is not a good standing space.  Everyone sitting on their comfy sofas, are pretending it’s their personal living room,  people watching, and judging those NOT in seats..   I think I’ll pass.

The second option is to go to the bar at The Breslin…. Much preferred! Let me sit at a bar and drink my slightly dirty martini in peace without feeling those judging hipster-wannabe eyes on me.

A few things to know about The Breslin before you go:

1) The cocktails are great, but expensive (at least $12 a pop, my dirty martini was a whopping $15)

2) Only go if you’re a carnivore that likes to experiment

3) You’ll actually want to go to the gym the next day

The Breslin Bar has phenomenal bar snacks!  My friend Tracy went straight for the Beef & Stilton Pie…  a tiny little meaty cheesy pie that’s literally four bites of happiness.  She ordered another.

A personal warning that the “spiced almonds” should be called “spicy almonds”.  A British guy at the bar, talking it up with Tracy, thought I should have known better since it was “spiced”.   But I’m sorry; there is a difference between spiced and spicy.   This Brit was cute, but thought putting me down was supposed to be funny.  When I asked him to repeat something I couldn’t hear, he asked if I was deaf.  Is that funny or what?

Other snacks come in adorable travel friendly packages.  The pork scratchings brought me back to my Atkins Diet days.  I forgot how good light and crispy fried pork skin could be, and the Malt Vinegar and Sea Salt Crisps were addictive.

After enduring another four or five insults from “The Brit”, he asked to take me to dinner sometime.  I was absolutely  dumbfounded.  Maybe I just need to learn how to play tougher in the schoolyard and finesse my sarcasm skills?  OK, bring it on Mr. Brit.  I consider it a challenge!

Dinner was great.  Get the famous lamb burger with the thrice-cooked chips.  After just two bites of this juicy burger I announced to the table, “I’m coming back to get this again!”

It was cooked beautifully medium rare and the combination of special sauce and meat-to-bun ratio was PERFECT.  I highly recommend it.

The thrice-cooked chips (aka french fries) kind of astounded me.  They were super crispy on the outside, yet soft and mashed potato-like on the inside.

My take on the Breslin -

The bar is a great place to  have a drink with a friend, or meet new friends.  The dinner menu is extremely limited if you want to eat healthy or on a budget.  I truly hope the menu changes with time.  The Breslin has a fabulously sexy and fun atmosphere ideal for dates and group dinners.  Sadly, the food is not for everyone.   I like to think I’m an experimental foodie, but I would never order the Stuffed Pig’s Foot or Fried Head Cheese with Sauce Gribiche.

Oh!  I almost forgot to mention the suckling pig dinner at the chef’s table.  Great idea.  It’s $65 per person for a real feast next to the open kitchen.  I watched ten Asian men devour an entire pig and lots of sides (see photo below).  Should I have asked to be their geisha girl for the evening?

The Breslin Bar & Dining Room
16 West 29th Street

Breslin Bar & Dining Room on Urbanspoon

MLHARRISFL April 5th, 2010

Let us know how the date went with the Brit. And practice these sentences.
You are a berk, and if you keep insulting me you”ll be Billie-no-mates! Are you totally gormless and off your onion?

sarah April 5th, 2010

This is hysterical!! Great review. Unfortunately, this is not my cup of tea… I will pass.

Thanks for sharing and keep writing!!

Bklynbutterfly April 6th, 2010

I think it takes a week to digest that lamb burger so we won’t be going back for a while but I can’t stop thinking about those little pies…..yummy yum yum.

Barbara Gabbe-Harris April 7th, 2010

Very funny! I feel like I am living viacariously through my daughter’s culinary adventures! Could almost taste those incredible “fries” – the lamb burger … not so sure!!! great photos too! The Suckling pig table – sublime! mom

Carole, as in Aunt April 27th, 2010

Ditto about tasting the fries! I’d skip the lamb burger, but not skip reading your unique revues. The photos are a big plus. I love the photo of YOU. And I’d take out that word ‘hopefully’ before the ‘one day’. KEEP ON KEEPING ON with this, Lauren. You’re on to something wonderful for yourself and all of us recipients. Carole

Niki in Melbourne May 9th, 2010

I’m interested and intrigued by those above who wouldn’t try the lamb burger because your review was so flattering about it. Although I did notice that lamb wasn’t so popular in the US, which, for an Australian, is unbelievable. Why is that? It really surprised us how little we saw lamb on menus over there. The one time I had it, at WD-50, it was much stronger and gamier than what we’re used to down under. Maybe that’s why it’s not popular?? For Aussies it’s without doubt, the best of the meats: so flavoursome. Although this Aussie is also a massive fan of beef and pork, and that pic of the whole suckling pig is going to pervade my dream fantasies!

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